Rapport Reveals...Empathy Heals! part 1

"The toughest thing about the power of trust is that it's very difficult to build and very easy to destroy. The essence of trust building is to emphasize the similarities between you and the customer." Thomas J. Watson     Happy Friday!   In sales and life, we are all told we have to connect.  I have been in sales training where they said the first 5 minutes of a sales call are the most critical.  Why?  Those minutes will determine not if the prospect likes your product...it is whether they like you.   We all know that people buy from people they like.  We have heard that one 1,000 times.   That is a lot of pressure.    The "naturals" in the business have an effortless way of weaving in conversations about things they observe in the prospects surroundings.  The pictures of family, the trophies on the shelves, the roses in the garden.  They play "6 Degrees of Separation" trying to connect themselves to the client in a meaningful way.   To give us a better chance of having things to connect with, we join associations, become active in the business community and network...all in an effort to make connecting with others easier and less haphazard.  That is not time wasted.  One good connection could be the difference between a prospect and a client.  Sales training usually calls this phase of the sales process Building Rapport.    Before you can demonstrate what the product can do, you have to demonstrate who you are and what difference you bring to the process.  There are many others out there vying for the same clients and product differentiation is small.  People are the big difference.   That is why I call this vital phase of the sales process Relating.    It is a matter of building trust.  Not the lifelong "friend I can count on you through thick and thin" brand of trust, but transactional trust.  Relating is the gateway to that trust.  Trust is required to have people spend money with you.  If your product costs $1,000, then you have to earn $1,000 worth of trust.  Face it, people have buying choices that don't involve you.    Like Amazon.  People trust Amazon.  The question they ask themselves,  Why should I spend this $1,000 with you and not Amazon?  That is where Relating is powerful.  It is a higher form of trust building than rapport alone - it is a potent mix of building rapport and conveying empathy.  Delivered with sincerity and Your Authentic Sales Voice.    Rapport Reveals what is common between people...Empathy Heals what is separating them.    I will explain more in the next few Crumbs but on your next sales call, examine what truly creates bonds of trust and facilitates progress in the relationship.  I think you will find that...   Rapport Reveals...Empathy Heals.    Until Monday, I wish you Money, Power, Success!

Communication Connects!

"Communication - the human connection - is the key to personal and career success." Paul J. Meyer   We live in a world of communication.  Just think, less than a couple of generations ago, we had no way of knowing what was happening across the globe  Now, we have Twitter and Instagram that lets us watch events unfold...live over our phone!    There is more information available to us now than at any time.  We also have an avenue to join into the conversations with blogs, videos uploads, forums and rating review systems.   If you have an idea or opinion, there is now freedom of expression and distribution that can put you in front of a large audience...fast!   There is nothing wrong with that.  As you can see, I add my ideas and opinions to the global community on a daily basis.  We all want our voice to be heard.   What do you want to communicate?   What do you want to say to your child that just got off the school bus after they have had a frustrating or exciting day?   To you spouse that has great news to share or is dealing with things at work or with their family?   To the prospect that is looking for your product or service to meet a need or solve a problem?   Are you offering up your opinions and ideas in a one-sided conversation - a monologue?  Are you engaging people in an interactive dialogue that provides a chance for common ground to be formed - a relationship to be built?    "To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others." Tony Robbins   To have a real relationship with the people in your life you have to be mindful that they have ideas and opinions, too.  That in order to build a platform of trust you have to be willing to give your voice but also receive the voice of others.   The most successful people in any walk of life or endeavor or those that communicate with clarity and power.  People gravitate to them.  There is a two way street of ideas and insight.  It is not a matter of a greater personality exerting their will over the lessor.  Great communicators are not egoists or arrogant...just confident in how they express ideas and opinions.   If you are struggling with people in your life, the likely culprit is communication.  If you are struggling with a low close rate, more effective communication is the single fastest way to raise it.  If you want respect, influence and cooperation of others, work on your communication because  Communication Connects!    Until tomorrow, I wish you Money, Power, Success!

Word Associations!

"Words are singularly the most powerful force available to humanity. We can choose to use this force constructively with words of encouragement, or destructively using words of despair. Words have energy and power with the ability to help, to heal, to hinder, to hurt, to harm, to humiliate and to humble. Yehuda Berg   The quote seems a little over the top until you think back to your last 5 conversations.  Really, take a moment to review the last 5 human interactions you've had - the place, the time, the circumstances.  Was it a friend, co-worker, spouse or stranger?   The common denominator for each of those interactions is words.   What makes each one of the interactions different is the way the words made you feel.   "I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel." Maya Angelou     Words are material and tangible versions of peoples thoughts. Our thoughts are electric impulses derived from stimulus given to us from the five physical senses and our emotional state and psyche at the time we speak them. Most of the time, we hold our deepest thoughts to ourselves and filter our words so as not to offend at every turn.  Other times...you get the picture!   Anyone ever caught you at "a bad time"?  The words you speak in that moment might have been totally different 15 minutes ago...or 15 minutes later.  You say them before you have a chance to filter them or think them through.  We all know that words spoken in anger cut deep.    Thankfully, so do words spoken with compassion.   As I have gotten back on the road, I am even more conscious of the words I speak.  Not because I want to be smooth and silky in my presentation to close more sales.  That would be manipulation and is disingenuous and not sustainable.    I am now looking down on the transaction much like a reporter covering a story.  20 years ago, I would have just wanted the sale.  Now I want to understand what creates the Moment of Truth that turns a prospect into a client...a client into a raving fan...a stranger into a friend.   I have known the answer all along but I am now more conscious of it and my part in the interaction.  The "secret" to closing more sales, building better relationships and living a higher level of life?   In a word...words   The next few days I will play a game with you about connecting the dots between words, emotions and the results that bring success...we will play a game of     Word Associations!    Until tomorrow, I wish you Money, Power, Success!

Oh Yes...I Still Can!

Happy Monday!   Ever wonder where some of our witty sayings come from?  I spend a lot of time researching quotes from great women and men throughout history.  That is interesting to me.   Most of our sayings today come from an original quote that has been "revised" for satirical meaning - a play on words of the original quote.  Many times, the original saying goes forgotten in lieu of the new amended saying.  One such quote;   "Those that can, do; those that can't, teach." Bernard Shaw from "Man and Superman"   We use the phrase to demean those of us that have stopped doing "the work" and have taken on the enviable task of training the next generation of pupils.    That would be me.   I stand up in classroom environments, conduct webinars and write books on a varieties of subjects focused on sales...and life.  Sometimes a student will stand up and say that some of what I discuss isn't possible or practical in the "real world".  It is a diplomatic way of saying that I am out of touch with the real world.   Ouch!  While I have no ego to bruise and havemaintained that I don't know everything, the things I teach have come from years of experience.  Tested by time.  Proven by success.   This year, as I finished a powerful new book on the being a Senior Insurance Advisor -  6 Hours to 6 Figures (available at Amazon now!), I decided to step out from behind my teaching desk...and do.   The last 3 weeks, I have been running the road just like I did 17 years ago in an industry I love - helping our seniors make important decisions.  The next several days of Crumbs will not be to refute the cynics, critics, or those that feel that already know everything.  Debate is wasted on people who already have formed an inflexible opinion.    It is for those who need to know that the original quote from Aristotle still applies;   "Those that know, do. Those that understand, teach."   Running the road has quickly taught me that I missed being "in the mix".  It has also shown me areas where my book and trainings can be improved.  My success the last few weeks also reminds me that doing something you love is the key to real success.     Just like the saying, "You never forget how to ride a bike", when it comes to effective selling in the "real world"...    Oh Yes...I Still Can!    Until tomorrow, I wish you Money, Power, Success!